Sluts Together

I was talking to a friend the other day about compatibility and how she has nothing in common with her partner at all, though she loves him dearly. That got me thinking. “Come to think of it,” I said, “I have nothing in common with Himself either.
He likes jazz – I don't much. He loves boating – I don't. I love being outside and walking – he will take the car whenever possible, and is quite happy poodling around indoors (unless on a boat). I am quite sociable whereas he'd sooner be by himself – or with me. I love going to the pictures, out with friends – he'd rather watch a DVD at home.”

I stopped – because the list could go on ad infinitum, and wondered what exactly we DID have in common. Then I got it. “A sense of humour!”

This was illustrated yesterday prior to the arrival of my mother which necessitates a big spring clean (well, tidy and hoover) which is a most rare occurrence in the Flowerpot household.

“We must have a big tidy up,” said Himself, sitting down with the paper.

“No, no,” I said, not looking up from my book. “I dusted last week so it can't be bad.”

Silence. We looked at each other and laughed and laughed until Himself was crying and I had stomach ache.

So that's something else we have in common. We're both sluts.

Household Tips

The Lady Thinker tagged me for a meme about household tips which has had all my friends howling with laughter. They know that I’m the least houseproud person of all.

The sad truth is, I couldn’t think of any household tips at all.

But I couldn’t admit to that, so I’ve been racking my brains and I’ve come up with this.

Always have a roll of kitchen paper, a newspaper and some Dettol spray.

If you happen to be house training a puppy, which we were a few years ago, the newspaper and spray are essential. Don’t use kitchen paper for this.

Newspaper is vital for lighting fires, of course. You can even read it if you feel the need. Why is it that out of date newspapers are much more interesting than current ones? Like other people’s food. Or baked beans from the tin.

Now you know what a real slut I am.

For spillages – of which there seem to be many in this household, use kitchen paper or newspaper depending on the severity.

As for hoovering? My excuse is that I’m too short sighted to see the dust, let alone hoover it up. But I am blessed with a husband who not only knows what the hoover looks like, but knows how to use it.

Thank God for that.