Monday, 24 September 2007

Fraught Weekend and TV Fame

A busy weekend here at Flowerpot House. My 78 year old mother, who has recently recovered from major surgery, was staying but warned that she wouldn’t be able to do much.

‘That’s fine, Mum,’ I said, picturing a sedate wander through town and a cup of coffee.

Saturday afternoon saw us striding into town (she walks FAST), to the bookshop, stopping at various places along the way. She doesn’t wander when she shops, she streaks in and out like a collie rounding up sheep. We spent an hour in town before going off to take Moll for a Proper Walk. My blood sugar level was starting to tumble, and after walking for half an hour I suggested we start back (making it an hour long walk).

‘Oh,’ said Mum. ‘Why don’t we just go a bit further? Just to the end of that field.’

‘OK, Mum. Fine.’ I mean, I couldn’t be walked off my legs by my dear Mum. I’m fit, for God’s sake. Or thought I was…

That evening I was assembling a meal when I realised that whereas there had been three bits of salmon for our tea, there were now only two.

‘Oh,' said Himself. 'I thought it was empty so I threw the carton away.’

God – men! I delved into the bin and out came everything teabags, egg shells, potato peelings – everything except salmon.

As I was half way down the bin, I heard a squeak from the shower.

‘Hello!’ called Mum, her voice rising in panic. ‘I can’t turn the shower off! Help!’

Having turned Mum’s shower off, the phone rang. Thankfully Himself answered. It was James. He couldn’t work out how his new hole punch worked. Himself, who possesses infinitely more patience than me, spent the next half an hour explaining to James how to put a piece of paper in, and punch the holes.

Back in the kitchen I wondered about the salmon and turned to the animals. ‘Mollie! Buster!’ I shouted. ‘Have you been eating salmon?’

Both animals looked at me with that angelic, ‘Who, me Mum?’ expression, and I abandoned all hope of finding the salmon. It had gone, I think down Bussie’s gullet.

I retired to the front room with a Very Large glass of wine. My God it tasted good.

Tonight is the filming of the Westcountry Writers debate (for TV) featuring a panel of people including yours truly, though how they got these people or who the others are I have no idea. (Before you get excited, the end result will be edited down to 4 minutes.) I don’t know when it’s being shown – sometime next year I presume – but will find out and record it for posterity. Well, I would if the video was working but that’s another story.

I am now off to mug up on Mary Wesley, Betjeman, Hardy, Agatha Christie and Daphne du Maurier. Watch this space, now I’m a television luvvie, darlings.
Actually, I’m quite nervous.


Cornish Dreamer said...

Sounds indeed like a busy weekend, but I hope that it was a good one for all that.

Much luck for tonight and the filming. I'm sure you'll do a grand job.


Flowerpot said...

Well,, we'll see, RT!! Any clangers will be broadcast for all to see - unless I can persuade them to edit them out!!

Elaine Denning said...

If you're as articulate and funny and intriguing and interesting as you are on here, you'll do a grand job.

So how did you divide up 2 pieces of salmon between 3? I bet the pets didn't get a look in!

Flowerpot said...

thanks MissU - we'll see. Luckily the bits of salmon were quite big so I chopped them both into two and unfroze some Tesco Value prawns. That bulked it out a bit.

Lane Mathias said...

flowerpot, if something foodie goes missing I check their teeth. The evidence is always in there somewhere:))

Hope the filming went well!

Flowerpot said...

lane - that's an excellent tip. I will try that. Filming is tonight so will update tomorrow!

Anonymous said...

Good luck - I'm sure the camera will lurve you dahling!

Em said...

Good luck for tonight, hope it goes well - I'm sure you'll get into the swing and it'll all go beautifully well.

Can sympathise about the salmon - Seth cat was desperate to get at Tracy's pork chop last night, I caught him about to jump onto the worksurface to steal it! He denied everything, of course...

Chris Stovell said...

Look, just shove everyone else out the way and hog the camera so we can all see you!

the rotten correspondent said...

How exciting! Perhaps you'll post a video for us to see? Hmmm?

I woke up this morning to find the laundry room trash can contents strewn across my entire downstairs and three angelic dog faces looking at me. I'll have to try the teeth trick next time.

Flowerpot said...

graham - being teh world's most unphotogenic person, I rather doubt that!

Em - thanks for that. Glad you managed to rescue Tracy's pork chop!

Chris - I think I'll be hiding behind the others if I can!

correspondent - not sure that my technical skills are up to that, or even if we get a video. I'll have to ask. Yes, Moll has done that trick on me before!

Akelamalu said...

Almost outwalked by an old lady - shame on you! ((wink))

Quick thinking with the prawns - well done.

Hope the filming goes well, can't wait to hear all about it. :)

Lesley Rigby said...

I would love to know who would have been given the salmon if you had found it in the bin?

Checking their teeth is a brilliant idea but not if they have to be taken out!

Anonymous said...

Your mum sounds amazing. Are you sure it wasn't her who ate the third piece of salmon! It's quite something when our mum's seem fitter than us.

Hope the tv screening went well.

Crystal xx

Flowerpot said...

I know Ak, my mother is amazing. It seems to run in the female side of the family!

lesley - I would have done the honourable thing, washed off the salmon and had it myself. Well, probably...

crystal - yes my mum is amazing. But she eats very little so she woudlnt have had that last bit!!