Wednesday 1 September 2010

The Charmer


Well here's a charmer...

With Tony Blair's autobiography out today, excerpts are splattered all over the papers and one political journalist on breakfast news had read an advance copy – over 700 pages of it – and confessed to TB having “used his usual charm” so that by the end of the book the journalist found he “almost liked” TB.

This got me thinking - what is charm and how is it manifested? Himself and I were discussing it while walking the Molls this morning and, of course, our views differed.

“It's to do with words,” said Himself.

I think he's right but I believe it goes further than that. I think that charm is the ability to make the other person/people believe they are important and special. Which of course is done with words – and actions. A well placed hand on the shoulder. A smile and a hug. Tears maybe. A sense of empathy.

And then comes the difference between CHARM and CHARMING. I think charm is a gift, whereas being charming is something that most of us can learn to a certain extent, though some are better at it than others (mentioning no names of course). For example, a salesman or politican has to persuade people to buy that TV or vote for them. They have to persuade people that they are right. That they know best. Is this learning how to be charming?

When I asked Himself who he could think of who had charm, he replied, without a sliver of hesitation. “Me.”

So who can you think of who has charm? Other than my husband, of course.

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

I agree with you. But I'm not going to buy TB's book, charming or not! I don't think I could stand to have his face on my book shelves.

CJ xx

Flowerpot said...

I would hope not! That face would give me nightmares...>!

Akelamalu said...

I agree with you about charm - my husband has it. Trying to think of who else has it I came up with - Tom Cruise and John Barrowman.

Flowerpot said...

Ak - that your husband is charming doesn't surprise me!

Talli Roland said...

Aw! What a charmer. :)

I'm so sick of Tony Blair and hearing about this book! I'm boycotting!

Flowerpot said...

Talli - I don't think you'll be the only one!

ADDY said...

Toy Blair's got charm? That's surely a contradiction in terms?

Ellee Seymour said...

Helen Mirren has charm. I think charm includes grace too. Yes, Blair did have it and was an accomplished public speaker, but he lost the trust of the people, and his charm could not save him.

Colette McCormick said...

I think I would rather poke my own eyeballs out than read that book.

Flowerpot said...

Addy - most would agree with you, but for some he has!

Flowerpot said...

Ellee - yes I agree Helen Mirren has - I think Judi Dench does too. Interesting interview with Andrew M last night.

Flowerpot said...

Colette - love it!!

Chris Stovell said...

I really enjoyed your psot, as usual, but right now I can only think of utterly charmless folks! Says something about my current state!

Flowerpot said...

Hi Chris - things sound a bit fraught your end. Hope all is well.

Bluestocking Mum said...

I agree with Ellee that charm exudes grace too.

And that Mr Blair had it in the early days but you can't get through life with charm alone as he has found.

Is it just me, but for men in particular, is there a fine line between charm and smarm?

I HATE a smarmy man.
x

Flowerpot said...

Bluestocking - I have to say I can't stand smarminess either. And yes I think there is a very fine line between charm and smarm. In some cases, almost indecipherable...

Vermont Designs said...

Dubya is the smarmiest person I can think of. So glad I don't have to see that mug anymore, well, not often anyway. 8-( xxSS.

Flowerpot said...

Shelagh - ooh I agree!xx

Deborah Carr (Debs) said...

I won't be buying TB's book either, it was bad enough having to watch him on tv for so long.

Flowerpot said...

Debs - I wonder who HAS bought it?!