Monday, 18 February 2008

Annie and Toenails

On Thursday we go and collect Annie, an Old English Sheepdog who belongs to a friend of ours down the road. The indomitable 82 year old Betty, Annie’s owner, is going on a cruise for three weeks and rather misguidedly, at Christmas time I volunteered to walk Annie in the mornings. (Betty’s son is staying in her house while she’s away to look after Annie but being a breakfast chef he starts work at 6am so can’t do that shift.)

I’m rather wishing I’d kept my trap shut to be honest. Annie’s a darling but it is quite a responsibility looking after someone else’s dog – what if she was ill or ran away (God forbid)?

I’m sure nothing will go wrong but note to self. Think before opening mouth. Some hope.

On Saturday we were walking down the High Street and passed the barber’s shop. The shop next door to him has been empty for a while and now looks as if someone’s about to set up a new establishment.

“It could be the barber’s wife,” said Himself. “She does toenails and that sort of thing.”

When I’d finished hiccuping from laughter, I said, “toenails? You mean manicurist?’

He grunted and strode forth. “Manicurist?” he said. “You expect me to be able to say that at this time of the morning? Toenails is bad enough.”

I was laughing so much by this time I could hardly breathe, but managed to say, “I don’t think you’d get many customers if you advertised as Doing Toenails.”

“Don’t see why not,” he said, undeterred. “Manicurist sounds a bit bloody snooty.”

So there you go. Remind me never to ask my husband to become my publicist.


Aoj and The Lurchers said...

*snorting with laughter* He does come out with them doesn't he!?

Actualy, "Doing Toenails" has a bit of a ring to it!

MarmiteToasty said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA this so made me laff this sunny Monday morning.... blokes aye..... shaking me head.....

Ok I must scarper I need to nibble me toenails, they have grown to long LOL


Flowerpot said...

aol - yes he does! I wish I could bottle them, but writing them down will have to do.

marmite - glad it made you laugh as well!

Elaine Denning said...

I wonder what the sign would have said had it been a waxing shop.
"I do pubes" maybe?

Bless him!

BreadBox said...

Coffee. On lap. Via nose. Thanks, FP!


Flowerpot said...

MissU - well it would have been had it been his shop!!

Breadbox - sorry, hope laptop recovers!

laurie said...

ah, but it's good of you to walk the dogs. you won't lose her. and it's such a load off your friend's mind.

toenails, funny. pedicure, anyway. manicure is hands.
pedicure is feet. i've never had a manicure but pedicure is heaven

Flowerpot said...

laurie - I hope we dont lose her. I dont think we will butyou know what it's like at 3am.... as for pedicures, I've never had one. Or a manicure come to that...

Akelamalu said...

LOL Toenails are what my boys used to say they got in the apple crumble at school!

MWM had his toenails done on a beach in Thailand. He woke up just in time to hear her ask

"What colour you want on toenails?"


Flowerpot said...

ak - that's put me off apple crumble for life!!

Cornish Dreamer said...

This had me laughing out loud FP! ha ha.

I'm sure everything will be fine with your friend's dog.

Thank you very much for last night, ET really feels the cold (like I told my Mum...I've been preparing myself for an Ice Age so I don't really feel it!), so sitting in front of the fire was fantastic for her. The blanket worked wonders! Thanks again,


Ellee Seymour said...

She looks high maintenance, but I know she couldn't be in better hands.