Abandon all Diets

Last night the diet was abandoned. Having decided to Cut Down the wine, he – er – didn’t. Mind you, it could have been worse. The Diet In the Bin was blamed on Himself’s poor state of health – he felt shivery and his sinuses ached and his nose streamed all day apart from when he was working and playing the cornet.

The germs seemed to subside when I gave him some Nurofen (the wonders of modern science) though he seemed surprised when I asked if it had helped.

“Actually, yes, Pop,” he said. “Funny that.”

No comment. On the way home from walking the dog, he decided that he would get a) brandy (to kill the germs) and b) sausages and spuds because he didn’t fancy the leftovers in the fridge.

He also got a bottle of wine but stood staring at the large bottles of brandy, willing the price to go down, in a frenzy of indecision.

Eventually I couldn’t stand it. “No point in feeling vile in the morning AND having a brandy hangover,” I said. “Why not get a miniature?”

He agreed and we went to the cigarette kiosk where he realised that it was more expensive to buy a miniature because they’re so small. “I could have bought a half bottle for the same price!” he cried.

Luckily he knocked himself out with wine and paracetamol.

We have a long drive today, down to Sennen Cove where I’m doing an interview with a couple who have recently opened up a campsite down there. Shelagh – don’t worry. We will have another recce when you come over! Mark, if there’s time we’ll go to Treen as well. We’re taking the camera so hopefully I can enlighten you lot with the beauty of the Cornish spring.

I’m wondering how his hangover will be. Because of course, being a man he will deny that he has one….